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♥ ♥ ♥

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abcdefghijKELLY
&I can't wait to turn 18
Currently schooling at pioneer junior college


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♥ oh- gucci love ♥

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god bless me with a ♥wonderful family♥, great bunch of "loves" & the best boyfriend
just what more can i ask for?
& i'm just so in love with patrick, yes yes patrick
♥ Give me a magical wand &.. ♥

♥ i'll sprinkle bits of love to my endeared ones& of course bless myself with a awesome A level cert
♥ Links ♥

Aaron ♥
Alan ♥
Adria (:
Alicia ♥
Aimi (:
Adeline (:

David ♥

Dalton ♥

Ervina♥

Jovene ♥
Jia ying ♥
Junze (:
Jal ♥

Kunjing (:
Kun Biao (:

Ruimin (:

Maveric (:
Melody (:

Ning ♥
Nicholas (:
Nelson (:

Ruimin (:

Seok hoon (:

Shang Ying (:

Timbernerslee - PW
Tanny (:

Wanyi ♥

Yaya ♥
Yinlin (:

Zhijie (:
Zongweiis (:
Zhu cheng (:
Zhi yuan (;



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The memories

May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008


♥ Tuesday, October 30, 2007







HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO QIANGQIANG,ALMOND&LAOPO ! ;D

29th&30th of october (:
both of my dearest turned 17 ! yay !
&almond turned 19 ;D

actually, laopo&i concluded that turning 17 aint any big thing,
18/21 is the crucial&important year for us.
it`s a huge turning point, after 18years old, we can simply do
much much more things like clubbing etc ;D so, we do not have
to use underhand means to sneak into overage parties. ggaaahhh.

we celebrated both of their birthdays on consecutive days (:
we played like crazayes&acted like fools ;D

one thing not to be excluded was that we went to have the hot&spicy
steamboat buffet together. just when we were settling the bill&stuffs,
candy&laopo dropped one dollar into the soup.
we guys got nothing to do, so we dig&dig. we cleared the soup
&finally i found it ! ;D hahaha. a sense of great achievement la ;D
we cheered&cheered for that only-one-dollar. LOL.

we went for ice skating also ;D it was very fun.

i hoped this two dearies of mine enjoyed themselves&like the presents.
laopo&i gave qiangqiang a puma belt&a cake ;D
i gave laopo a huge precious moments storage box.
inside the box was a puma bag, a book, another book with my wishing
in it, three pairs of earrings, some undies&a red pullover ;D

we love you all ;D





















XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS

♥ Sunday, October 28, 2007

26-28 OCTOBER 2007 (friday&saturday&sunday)

friday friday friday (: i skipped school today again.
it was the last day of school, no point going -.-

i met up with wilson&baba.
both of them accompanied me to bukit batok to collect my contact lenses.
after collecting my lenses, i went back to choa chu kang.
i met up with candyheart&ling (:

we went shopping ! ;D then, we met up with that two guys again.
we went to boat quay&had a drink or two.
i drank too much&was forbided by teowilson.

then, we went to zouk/phuture.
as usual, no underage parties&3/4 of us was underage.
still below 18. ggaahhhhh.
we got in with the help of nic ! yes, nic nic nic ;D
thanks nic. yes yes yes, i THANKED YOU. laugh out loud ! ;D
congratulation to us ! lalalalala.
wilson got in first, then followed by me, then baba&candy.
i was simply exhilarated when i saw them ALL GOT IN !
yes, exhilarated was the word ! i hold on to them&went jaja-gaga ;D
jumpy high-low here&there !!!!! ;D

we danced till 4AM. party ended
i went to macdonalds with wilson, baba, candy, enen,nic&gang
we ate & slacked around. zhijie&friends came to pick us up.
they drove us to chieu pei`s chalet. we got bathed&cabbed home.
happy happy birthday to chieu pei ! ;D
it was already saturday then ;D

my saturday was spent sleeping. yes, SLEEPING ;D
slept for the whole day till sunday ! ((:

sunday sunday.
i went to get my stuffs with the company of teowilson.
that copy-cat, wore green too. dumbfcuk is the word ;D

he ate mcspicy&teared. dont know why.
&he was super shy&embarrassed. LAUGHS*
somebody was veryvery obedient today also ! he didnt smoke ;D

he sent me to granny`s house.

home sweeet home ;D


XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS

♥ Friday, October 26, 2007

i guess i wont be able to blog for days, will not be coming home.
so, just to update a little now. ;D

im really glad that everyone is showing their concern to me due
to the the fact that im a little depressed over my results. sigh.
thanks everyone ! i will be fine&i must be fine ;DDD

it`s 7.58AM now. i`ve got nothing to blog about today,
except for those trivial stuffs, i had my cornflakes&milk etc ;D

my yesterday. ;DD
laopo`s&qiangqiang`s birthday are nearing !
i gonna do something about it.

i met up with wilson, we went for lunch at ajisen at noon.
then, we went to town&start shopping ;D
it`s always different bringing guys to shop, because -
guys will always offer to carry your shopping bags/whatsoever on hand,
but girls wont, one simple reason : girls have their own shopping bags to carry !

we shopped&shopped non-stop.
many many thanks to him ; for all those trivial&insignificant stuffs done ;D

we shopped for 5 hours ? then, we met up with victor&jovene for dinner.
we didnt went for dinner straight, but went to the movies instead.
we watched : HALLOWEEN as suggested by thrill-lover : jovene.

it was a M18 show.
it was really terrifying ! every second was intimidating ! grrrrr.
the show was about a massacre on halloween`s where this KID wore a
mask that resembled a clown(im very afraid of clowns) and he went on
a killing rampage. sick ! i didnt really notice the way he killed,
but the sounds effects were horrifying enough. -.-
years later, he freed himself from the mental institution by killing all the polices.
and it was halloween`s then, he went around killing again.
behind these killings was one reason : he just wanted to find his blood sister.
lastly, he found her&he was killed by her. sigh.

enough of this movie,
then, we went to LJS for supper ?! hahaha. it was 10 pm then.

on the way walking home, we all were like walking-corpse. exhausted.
home sweeeet home. ;D


XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS

♥ Thursday, October 25, 2007

my results. it was ATROCIOUS ):
it was really bad and it`s way beyond satisfactory.
yesyesyes, it was that poor. sigh.

whether i can promote depends on the overall score,
and i really did very poorly for my mid-year examinations.
sigh. i know there`s no point being moody&staying dejected.
i cant change the outcome, i just gonna pray for the best.
all the best to all jC-1 peeps too.

ggaahhh. i teared upon receiving my papers )':

i cabbed home immediately after school.
friends got worried&came to my school to accompany me.
i love you guys, forever staying by my side (:
& not forgetting wilson also. thanks, really thanks.
thanks for your surprise cheesecake ;D
i know you aint good with words, but, action speaks louder than words (:

i went out with someone super-like-kid today. HAHA.
we met up for macdonalds breakfast (:
he lost his hand phone, yes, very unlucky.
but, it`s alright, i gave him 'something' !
he aint down on his luck anymore ! ;D

we went to westmall to have my contact lenses done (:
then, to IMM to get something very important !
pepperlunch-ed. ajitei-ed.

enjoyed my day. thanks to wilson ;P
记得我们不能说的秘密*


XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS

♥ Monday, October 22, 2007



FRIDAY (19/10/2007)

on friday, i skipped school. i didnt go out until 8pm++
i went out with jovene (: we went to kbox&sang.

past midnight, home sweet home (:

SATURDAY (20/10/2007)

every saturday is a so-music day ! (((:
piano-ed&music clinic-ed.
diaphragm lesson today was really interesting,
i learnt a lot from lynn lao shi, i must say - she was great (:

tomtom came to pick me up, then we went to plaza singapura
to meet my dearies - YI-JIA-REN !!!! ;D

it`s a family day ! with laopo, tomtom, candy&qiangqiang
i really cherished these little sweeet moments spent together
with them (: i dont know why, just to my "yi-jia-ren", all of us
can easily open up our hearts to one another. i just feel very
comfortable&safe with you guys, because i know, no matter
what, we will stay together&be there for each other. it aint just
words. we meant what we said&efforts were really put in to
maintain our little family (: we knew it best ourselves ;D

then, we went to this very interesting cafe - mindsCAFE.
haha. we had lots of fun&quality time spent there ! ;D
it was really entertaining&hilarious especially the sausage part =x

laopo went off earlier (: we guys went to kbox at cineleisure.
we adopted the k buffet package also. the food was average.
we sang&sang&sang&sang. not forgetting to imitate tomtom's
funny actions. he always sang as though he was on-stage. HAHA ;D

we bus-ed home. eff-ing tomtom kept mentioning about him on the bus.
okays. he made me cried&candy+qiangqiang was kinda pissed off also.
grrrrrr. i was super irritated. i was about to flare up when tomtom
patted me on my head& said :
my dear, you have to walk out of this, dont worry, i will be with you ;D
okays. my anger was appeased (: i love you, friend.
(okays, i have to reinforce this : he`s not my bf, we are merely FRIENDS)
i went to meet my babe&we clabbed home together with rena.


SUNDAY (21/10/2007)


firstly, HAPPY 21ST MONTH ANNIVERSARY TO CANDY&QIANGQIANG
it`s their anniversary&im really happy for them because both of them are
my close-est friends. they were together for months,
and i know, they gonna be together for years&years - till forever.

i went to work - REDLABEL`BLACKLABEL
okays. it was only for a day ;D im still schooling.
it was a very fun&entertaining day with entertainers around. ;D

home sweet home with *BAH BAH BAH ;D


MONDAY (22/10/2007)


MONDAY BLUES BLUE BLUEEEESSS !
it was a long&tiring day. our group did our oral presentation today.
for today's trial, we got to video-ed&filmed our presentation&everyone got
to see their comical&funny actions during presentation.
those actions&body gestures that we did without even realising ! ;P
we guys were laughing at ourselves on screen !
&candy said i look AL -.- grrrrrrrrr.

then, we had chinese lessons for 3 hours. grrrrrr T.T
&as usual, i skipped physical education ! hahahaha.
guan lin mentioned : those PE lessons you attended were countable ;p

home sweeet home&not forgetting to thank someone !
you reminded me of my good friend - BOOBOOOO ;DDDDD
heh. TY SO MUCH for your ferrero rocher&sweeeets&
taking time&trouble to drop by my house/unit (((:
YOU ARE SOOO RANDOM LAAAAA ! ;D still, thanks !
also, thanks jefferson for everything- calls&messages&consolations.
&not forgetting zhibin ! ;D thanks for your super long message !



































XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS

♥ Friday, October 19, 2007

i cant take it anymore.
here i am, lying in a pool of misery.
pain im feeling hurts, it`s not going to subside any soon.

sometimes, i can cover it well,
sometimes, i can fake it well,
sometimes, i can laugh louder than anyone else,
sometimes, i can hold that sickening smile on my face for hours,
sometimes, i can act as if i`ve got over those stuffs.

those old stuffs. those stuffs trillion years ago.
those stuffs he wont even remember.

tears after tears. crying alone at night,
with the thought of finding someone to talk&just hear me cry.
sometimes, i wonder, will they be irritated ?
irritated by my frequents cries ?
irritated by me crying over THE SAME OLD STUFFS.

just a simple photo, a simple flashback,
it will trigger all those never-ending tears.

who will understand&know how i feel ? deep inside.
no one, not even my family/best-est friends.
sometimes, i feel that those who claimed that they are my true
friends/buddies dont even care, perhaps, they dont even give a damn.

im such a weakling, i cant even hold on a even a second longer to cover
my despondency. it`s tiring. really.

my dispirited-ness all revolves around one thing : him.
what`s so great about him, i dont know.
what`s so nice about him, i dont know.
i just remembered those times, when i felt that he was true.

girls, it`s just disadvantaged to stay true&'faithful' to one.
love ? out there, in the field of love, i bet not many are true.

now, i tell you, if you dont love me,
PLEASE DONT LOOK AT ME IN SUCH A WAY,
PLEASE DONT GIVE ME FORLORN GLANCES,
PLEASE DONT CARE FOR ME,
PLEASE - DONT EVEN SAY A WORD.

sometimes, people told me, i think he still has that 'something'
for you, i think it`s not merely care&concern.
maybe.. maybe..
it`s all false hope.

i really dont understand why am i still reluctant to let go,
that relationship that i`ve not yet walk out since 7months ago.
forever, i will stay&live in regrets for im the one causing my own misery.

friends, dont send me those usual messages.
be ignorant, act like you are ignorant - these will be my greatest comfort.

how i wish i could just play&dance/or do whatsoever that
could brings at least a millisecond of those thoughts away from me.


XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS





now, itunes is playing one of my favourite song : cry on my shoulder
it`s a wonderful song - a little sad though ; makes me emo ><

okays. yesterday, i went home to change&went to lot1 with the thought
of using jovene`s ez-link card to borrow a book from the library. i cannot
do so because my identification card has got all the evidences of me
owing the fines from the library. so, i got 'barred' from all the borrowings ):
in the end, i didnt get to borrow the book i want ):

then, i accompanied my babe, together with vic&wilson to LJS for lunch.
it was already 3pm ++ then. we then decided to go bugis.
hahaha. it was really really random.
without much hesitation, we went to bugis.
&the train ride was super hilarious ! hahahaha.

we reached bugis&shopped. i bought nothing much, just a top from topshop.
then, we went to pool fusion for a few rounds of pool - in tag teams.
hahaha. then, we went on deciding on where to have our dinner.
silly babe was reminiscing the times she ate cup noodles with friends during primary school or whatsoever, so, we went to ate cup noodles ! hahahaha.
it has been really long since i ate that in the public.

then, we went on to aijitei for desserts. less than 15 minutes from
we stepped into ajitei, they told us : LAST ORDER. hahaha.
then, we hurried&ordered 4 sets of desserts. nice ((((:
also, my babe`s portion was exceptionally huge. lols.

we then trained home ((:
hahaha. okays. the train ride home was super entertaining.
i think the big-tummy-friendly-face uncle was really down on his luck to have met vic&wilson.

they walked us home&did super funny catwalks LA ;D

home sweeet home ;DDD


XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS

♥ Wednesday, October 17, 2007

today is another day - schooling.

our class have been having chinese lessons from 8.ooam - 1.oopm.
my girls&i arent focusing in class laa, except for the part on JY.
hahahaha. we just cannot stop laughing ! he's super hilarious !
he`s definitely entertaining :D especially his actions ! haha !

it`s also TAEKWONDO-day ! as usual, every wednesday(sometimes friday),
it`s co-curriculum activities day ! i went for taekwondo with my usual cliques.
siewling, wanyi & steph (((: we did trainings.
coach is preparing us well for th upcoming grading examination.
mycliques&i are aiming for green belt (: manymanymuchmuch luck to us :D
like always, coach is very humorous :D she never fails to entertain
my cliques&i with jokes of her everyday life -
today, it`s on her latest thailand trip (: HAHAHAHA.

also, not forgetting wanyi&i ran 2 rounds on the tracks today,
it`s not those normal runnings, it`s with our dubok ! oh my.
and. nowadays, the weathers are crazy, it`s warm like-dont-know-what
in the afternoon, but, it will be raining cats&dogs at night ! grrr.
deep gave wanyi&i discounts today (: TY ((:

after taekwondo trainings, girls&i went to lot1 for dinner.
okays, we went for dinner with victor&wl they all.
haha. i saw nicholas brother too. aww, he just spotted me while i was
shouting out for my girls, because they were simply walking too fast !
*super embarrassing laaaaaaa !* >< >.< >< >.< >< >.<
then, i went to popular with candy to shop for Q cards.
it`s needed for tomorrow's oral presentation ! aww.
i hope i dont go tongue-tied tomorrow !!!!

after everything, i went home.
that`s good girl. this is good girl ! (okays, nic ?) ;D


XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS

♥ Monday, October 15, 2007




haha. okays. my previous post : that very-unlucky saturday, the 13th.
afterall, it was not that bad also ! (((:


13 october 2007, saturday evening (:


after that consecutive unfortunate stuffs that happened to me,
i told my yi-jia-ren immediately. haha. they were all at different locations then,
but in the end, all came to my house within 2 hours time ! haha !
i assumed all of them came to accompany me laaa =P (except for dearest tom because he was out there working) nevermind (: okays. my yi-jia-ren were such an entertainment ! ((:
aww, all of them just cheered me up !!! =D my mood took a roller coaster
ride and went up-up-up to the highest point !
haha. it underwent an upswing through the accelerator effect by my yi-jia-ren ! thanks so much ! i just love all of you !

true friends are hard to come by, so, i will cherish all of you.
laopo, qiangqiang, candy&tomtom (: you guys were awesome !


qiang qiang once mentioned : one family, one heart, one soul (:


14 october 2007, sunday ((:


this very nice day ! ((: nice day with great people ((:
today, im out with ying&vina !!! hahaha. it had been since 3-4 weeks since we last met ! okays. it was really fun ! although, the time we had spent together wasnt really long, but, indeed it was memorable ! it was really enough for me to reminiscene and think back (:
three of us went to kbox. haha. out of nowhere, ying told me she need to buy some personal stuffs - as in those personal stuffs girls need. hahaha. without much doubts, vina&i just went in to kbox first. unknowingly, vina&ying collaborated to deceive me !(for a good cause)
haha. the silly both wanted to give me a surprise ! indeed, it was surprising (:
they bought the cookies&brownies&had candles&happy birthday on it ! =D
haha. i was really touched when i saw that !!!! awwwwww !!!!


seriously, i love these two prettayes laaaa ! =D they were both giving me a belated birthday celebration ! haha. also, i received their presents too (: it was really thoughtful of them !
okays. we singed&singed. then, we went for neoprints ! haha. neoprints are always a must-have
when three of us go out ((:


jiaying&ervina (: im really glad to had known both of you. both of you who had really added colours&made a difference to my life. like i mentioned, true friends are really hard to come by, im really elated that god had placed you both into my life. just as all our paths crossed one another, i realised, god is really fair to me - to have placed both of you by my side. never will i forget the times vina first initiated to talk to me at heeren followed by ying. you both were my greatest companions over at heeren. also, times when ying came over to heeren& we both just stood at red label and talked for ours just as we realised we have that that that 'something' in common ! haha. my prettayes, i love this friendship of ours. really (:


one of the presents included a beautiful birthday card hand-made by ying.
one of the phrase etched into my heart, it goes like this :
anticipating the long road we have ahead just as we began to embark on it
since nov`o6, from strangers to friends (:
then, we parted to different locations (:


i went off to meet mommy&relatives for dinner at tung lok restaurant.
alright, the food was not bad. i love the desserts ! =DDDDD

home sweeeet home (:


also, friends, im fine now (: although still, there will be times im a little emo,
but, life still goes on ! i hope i ll understand this fact ((:


im glad that i`ve got XOXOXOXO ((: (laopo&candy knows !) hahaha !


15 october 2007 (monday)


okays. i did nothing much today. candy, laopo&i went to kbox today.
the other couldnt make it at the very last minute. okays.
we kbox-ed&sang for the whole day. ilovemygirls (:


16 october 2007 (tuesday)


argh ! school school school today. school was so-not-fun. grrrr.
but, i love the time spent with my class s31 (: they were great people.
heh. we ALL went for lunch together after school (:
a little class bonding laaaa (: everything was really nice,
except for lionel that bigbigbigbig super big bully. hahaha !


okays. i`ve been on a diet recently. grrr. i think im getting obese,
which is very very very unhealthy. so, i gonna reduce my daily intakes )

sweeets ? NO. chocolates ? NO )))):
how boring. that`s the sarcrifice i`ve to make.


replies to tags :


candy - okays. i love you, you love me lots MORE ((:
XD - um, sorraye, i dont understand what you meant by that.

jiaying - heh. yeaps ! thanks so much, girl. loves (: spending time with vina&you were great.

passerby - thank you (:

ling x) - laopo, yeahs, gonna wipe away my tears&all the unhappy memories(hopefully) (:

ahVIC - si victorrrr laaaaa ! grrrr.

=) - hees. yeahs. i will. gonna stay happy&not waste anymore time dwelling hard on the past ! gonna move on. thanks so much !

sher - yeahs. gonna look at things on the brighter side my dear (:

* - i agree what you had said. gonna heed your advice ! thanks !

... - heh. gonna be strong. yes (; ty.

san mao - heh. no lor. i did thanked you ! heh. xie xie laaaa =D

ah xian - thanks for the almost-everyday-calls just to make sure im alright ! (: ty

sh - linked (:

aaron - yeahs. im feeling better now. much better. no worries. ty.

kunjing - heh. cuttaye, gonna link you soon ! ((:

CH - haha. did we ? dont know.





















































XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS

♥ Saturday, October 13, 2007

october. it`s supposed to be a month of mine.
however, things do not always turn out to be what i had expected.

yesterday, i didnt manage to party. grrrr. -.-
my babe&i went to town. we shopped around&went for our very late dinner at 10 plus.
actually, we both wanted to go kbox, but all rooms were full.
alright, it`s kinda stupid to go in two. >< the more the merrier i know.
i saw ying&friends. we talked for awhile and parted to different places.
i met up with weisheng that cheeky monster.

midnight - home sweet home.
what a boring friday night.

today, i woke up very early for piano lessons.
the very blur me had forgotten that it`s a public holiday today !
grrr. then, i met up with parents for breakfast.
supposedly, im meeting up with candy, qiangqiang&laopo today.
then, i changed&headed towards music clinic for vocal lessons.
somebody then called to say lesson was cancelled (while im on my way).
alright, the very next minute, laopo messaged me to say she wasnt feeling that good, so she`s not joining us. grrr. it made me even more moody.
then, i went straight home.

this week, it isnt my week. things had been so unpleasant. why ?
furthermore, it`s the 13th today (laopo just reminded me of that)
im kinda superstitious i know. grrr !
'misfortunes doesnt come alone' how true.

however, im really thankful for those who were by my side all this while (:
i wanna specially thank a few ! (the rest are as important ALRIGHT =D)

laopo&candyheart for being so supportive&nice.
not forgetting qiang qiang also, after i teared, he was the FIRST to make me smile (:

yangyang, thanks for your everyday jokes !

ying&vina, thanks thanks thanks for the concern&messages (:
it really made me feel much better. loves.

ah xian, sorraye to make you worry for not picking up your calls !
and im sorry for making this entry a not-very-happy one.
hope tomorrow will be a better day that i can blog about something much joyful.

to the rest of my friends - thank you (:


XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS

♥ Thursday, October 11, 2007

loneliness is inevitable.
man cant do w/o friends, likewise, i cant also.
i cant even stand a minute being companion-less.

i like to have my schedule all packed.
work after work. tasks after tasks.
it`s best that i wont even have time to take a breath or so.

when one is alone, or perhaps, when im alone, i tend to ponder a lot.
ponder over all the unhappy stuffs.
i hate that feeling. it makes me tear, tear a lot.

sigh. as usual, i had school today.
friends were somehow kinda affected by my 'low-spirited' mood.
throughout the day, there seemed to be a something suppressing me, i dont know what was it. even the steps i took today seemed much heavier.

however, friends did their utmost efforts to cheer me up&spur me on.
im really thankful for that.
im sorry if my 'dejected' mood had affected you guys, i know you all wanted me to smile like usual, but i dont wish to put up a false front even in front of you guys. forgive me.
i have to act like normal at home, act like normal infront of daddt&mommy, act like normal infront of some. i cant cry or do whatsoever.
be understanding alright.

also, i had candyheart&laopo to accompany me back home today,
they accompanied&stayed with me till night. ty.

to all, please dont ask me what happened. if im willing, i ll tell. ty.


XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS

♥ Wednesday, October 10, 2007

a minute ago..
i saw it. i saw it. i saw it, something i swear i wouldnt want to see )':
im here crying hard now, but there`s simply nothing i can do.
nothing i can do. there`s nothing i can do.

i wanna stop tearing, but i cant.

my heart had already broken into pieces,
and it`s now all shattered. shattered.
it`s hurting so much that i wanna just die now, HERE.

i know it`s really foolish of me.
but, there`s nothing i know that can at least ease this pain in me.
it hurts. this pain is killing me, it`s tearing me into pieces.

up till this stage, this level of torment, i had only myself to blame.


XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS

♥ Tuesday, October 9, 2007

DEPRESSED.

ignore everything, i cant.
vent my fustrations, i cant.
run away from reality, i cant.
end my life, i cant.
not take into account the feelings of people around me, i cant.
stop worrying for them, i cant.
not to be depressed, i cant
elvo uyo t cain.

getting more&more depressed each day.

i had a dream last night. a bad dream.
it`s like a recurrence of the past events - the unhappy ones.
i woke up with the same amount of hurt inflicting onto me,
i had to go through the same amount&severity of pain again.
what can i do except for crying ?

first time, i had an urge to just end it all...


XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS

♥ Monday, October 8, 2007

sigh. okays. i hate to sigh.
mom mentioned something that i did everyday w/o realising.
mom said i sighed everyday.
i sighed when i woke up,
i sighed when i eat,
to put it simple, i sighed every now&then, everyday.

i just dont know why. life seemed meaningless.
"live life to the fullest" ? i dont know how to.

sorry mr X, i dont mean to hurt you. i really dont want to see you wasting your time over me. you are good, nice, sweet&kind. seriously, i dont wish to lie to you/even give you false hope. im thankful that i had found someone that loves me (: but, we ll just be F.R.I.E.N.D.S okay ? i know i have been ignoring your dont-know-how-many calls&messages. im sorry for that. i dont wish to see you clinging onto a never-will-it-happen relationship ? im sorry.

also, mr Y, not forgetting you too. i hope im too sensitive, but before you tell me what you gonna tel me.
i wanna say, F.R.I.E.N.D.S F.O.R.E.V.E.R =D

sigh. today`s gonna be over soon after a couple of hours.
tomorrow`s gonna arrive soon. what will my tomorrow be ? w you ? w/o you ?
i dont know. i dont wanna know. i will not know.
i hope tomorrow will be a better day (:

suddenly, just a few seconds back, i thought of world-most-loving-couple :
CANDYHEART&QIANG QIANG (((:

i just saw them an hour ago. both of them came to my house together with laopo. seriously, i wanna comment on this couple : they are so loving CAN ! aww. always, they`re close to quarrels, but never will they. one will always (and i need to repeat) - ALWAYS give in to another. they are such a perfect match. candyheart mentioned to me that she wont be able to live w/o qiang qiang, and they gonna get married to each other when it`s time to (: im sure qiang qiang thinks likewise too.

i wonder how many guys will stay faithful to their girls ? "hongsters" are everywhere. sigh.
guys are un-trustable creatures (i mean SOME guys). sigh sigh sigh.

okays. i know this is a very-much random entry (:
relationship ? a no-no for me ? but, im not gonna stay single anyway. HAHA.

im gonna say it one last time, i ve got no bf. STOP ASKING LAAAAA.
if ever there is one day i found myself a boyfriend, i will feature him on my blog (((: hahahaha.

im now talking to buddy on the phone, should be focusing and not doing so-many things at a go.
gonna end off this entry HERE. =DD


XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS

♥ Sunday, October 7, 2007


SUPER HIGH MOOD ((:


before i begin my super super long blog entry, i would like to thank the following people !

MY FAMILY (: DADDY,MOMMY&SISTER I LOVE YOU !
cousins (: yaya, ning, katherine, david, weien, xiaofen&joshua
yi jia ren (: laopo, wanyi, qing, tomtom&qiang qiang(tanpy)

Aaron (: my boo-boo !
ayun (: dumbo
alan (: brother
adrian (: buddy
ang da (: pigu
adria (:
andy (:
andrew (:

Chunyang (: yang yang guo de wang
celine (:
clement (:
charlotte (:
collin (:

David (: bfbfbfbf
domdom (:
Emily (:
edmund (:
ervina (:

Germaine (:

Heeyang ((:

Jiaying (:
jessica (:
jingyong (:
jasmine (:

Kenrick (: silly
kenken (:
koklong (:
kunjing (:
kaiming (:

Lionel (: HAHA baby
leon (: siweiting
licheng (:
luobin (:

Maveric (: benben
ming zhu (:
melvin (:
manfred (:

Nicholas (: brother
nicol (: twist-aye
nana (:

Raymond (:
rodney (: dumbdumb
rena (:
rayhan (:
ryan (:

Shuyi (:
shanyuan (:
sam (:

Terry (:
teck yee (:

Victor (: feisile

Weisheng (: buddy
wenjie (: sub-fan
weijie (: son
wei loong (:
wilson (:

Xian jun (:

Yibin (: sister
yati (:
Zhijie (: xlg

03/10/2007

i went out with mommy ! (: we went to clark quay central SHS for a haircut. i had my hair curled. it`s not really perm, i just wanna get rid of my old hair ! haha. we shopped around
home sweeeet home ((:

04/10/2007 (thursday)

it`s my day my day MY DAY ! im 17 !!! =D
it`s my birthday ! =D i wanna thank myloves for everything ! ((: heh.

it`s a day spent with "family" - my family&yijiaren. haha. i was treated like a princess this very day (: i woke up early in the morning having the urge for dou jiang you tiao. i was supposed to meet yi jia ren to town. heh. then, they accommodated to my "urge", and we went to geylang to have that. haha. it was a really warm day. walking down the road, with the scorching hot sun above, all of us were perspiring like dont-know-wut.

we then went to cineleisure to catch this movie - I. it was a movie i had always wanted to catch ! it was really hilarious ! *thumbs up ! after the movie, we went to take neoprints ! it was really nice ! =D

then we went to factory donut at suntec city ! yummy* along the way.
we cam-whored tonnes of times. =P

then, as time was running late ! i cabbed to merchant court hotel for the international buffet with my family (: the food was not bad. what was nice was MY FAMILY (: whole family got to sit together and enjoy our dinner - a really heartwarming one. this is love - XINGFU. then, we went to shop (:
home sweeet home (:
xiao pang zi accompanied me to talk on the phone till th 4th was over (: thank you.

05/10/2007 (friday)

early in the morning, yi jia ren came to my house to MJ. we MJ-ed. haha. lots of super hilarious stuffs happened. HAHA !

then, i washed up, got changed& went out with jovene to meet my darling cousins ! we went to chijmes to have our dinner - gyu-kaku. it was a japanese bbq restaurant (: haha. those sweeties did lots of stupid stuffs just to pass me th present. haha. (the beetle thingy). okays. you guys really frightened me !

after our dinner, we went to PARTY ! =D we partied from ZOUK TO PHUTURE ! haha. it was really fun ! "over-age" parties were definitely much more fun then those under-age parties. haha. although some stuffs did cropped up(my sweeties knew what was that). haha. but, it was really fun ! overall, i really enjoyed my day !!!! thanks thanks thanks ! i love you guys ! =D then, we reached home in the AM.

zhijie accompanied me to through the phone till i reached home. TY (: i dozed off straight after my bath.

06/10/2007 (saturday)

i slept for a few hours then got up for my piano lessons. i was supposed to be really sleepy. really really sleepy. i predicted a pair of "panda eyes" also. but none of it happened ! =D then i went to music clinic for vocal lessons. heh. theory lesson no.2. i had learnt a lot today ! ((: im also very excited about next week's diaphragm lesson ! =DD then, i took train home with the accompany of dumbo. haha. he`s super hilarious. home sweeet home (:














































































XOXO & overwhelming YAYNESS